Girl, You Have a Problem

I am a “super planner”. Those who know and love me know that I am a Planner Addict. I am currently using the MAMBI Big Happy Planner, along with countless sticker books, planner dolls, and assorted color ink pens to keep me on track in life. In this Happy Planner, I write everything: my failures, my successes, monthly and weekly goals, daily affirmations, dated memories and captured moments. Despite the pretty dolls and colorful washi tape, there is something I noticed when I actually looked at my Happy Planner: I am not living up to my full potential.

I am a dreamer. I have always had dreams that were bigger than my wallet and sometimes, I didn’t pursue those dreams because they simply were “unattainable”. If you read my blog post of fear, you will begin to understand a little more about the “limitations” I placed on myself. Despite how big I can dream, I still have a problem. You probably have the same problem that I have: execution.

In 2017, I graduated with a Master of Arts in Teaching from Armstrong State University. While I always knew I wanted to teach, I started to feel like there was something I was also supposed to be doing. I returned to my first love, writing. I wrote down all of these plans. I was going to enroll in a real estate class, start a Vintage boutique called Revamped Clothing, start a photography business called Reality Captured, and start a blog. Do you know how many of those things I actually did? Zero. Why? The ideas were there. I put in the work of coming up with concepts, designed logos, sharing them with people and really thinking I was going to do everything I ever dreamed off. So, the planning was there. I had the vision, I made it plain… but I couldn’t execute.

Let me ask you a serious question. How do you lose weight? The easy answer is to work off more calories than you take in. If I simply put my fork down after eating and go for a walk around my neighborhood instead of watching the latest episode of my favorite show, I wouldn’t be overweight, right? I can lose weight. I have the knowledge. I know how. It’s not a matter of knowing how. I just won’t. I refuse to wake up earlier to go to the gym or cook my own breakfast and lunch. I won’t park in the back of the parking lot so I can get closer to my 10,000 daily FitBit step goal. I just won’t. Sometimes, I won’t put an extra $250 in my savings account or commit to reading my bible every morning.

I may be alone in this… maybe it is just me. Do you have a goal that you are trying to reach? What is it? What is holding you back? Did you pay attention to the picture of my graduation cap (designed by Nia @ Love Letters Orders)? It says “If your dreams don’t scare you, they aren’t big enough.” When I obtained my Masters two years ago, I thought I wasn’t dreaming big enough. Now, I see… it isn’t about dreaming bigger. Girl, I have a problem and dreaming bigger isn’t it. I need to execute them.